Getting mail and snarky bureaucratic nonsense.

The Czech Republic: Home of hidden fees and bureaucratic nonsense. 

This may be another slightly negative post. 
I’m not knocking the Czech Republic. I’ve truly come to love my home this summer, but just like every country, there are things that just don’t make sense. 

I’ve now been to 3 different post offices, so I believe my opinion should be considered valid when I say the Czech system is bureaucratic nonsense. 

In the two regular post offices, I was going to give the system the benefit of the doubt. Maybe I had just come in at two of the busiest times of the day. Maybe the extremely long lines weren’t normal for a Tuesday…. or a Thursday.  Maybe the early closing times, and inconsistent hours of operation were due to some unknown holiday.

Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.

My mother sent me a package about 3 weeks ago. And just now was I finally able to get a hold of it. 

Here’s how this entertaining plight of nonsense went:

 I got a routine postal slip in my dorm mailbox, with the address of the post office where my package was.  I couldn’t make it during the first few days of open hours to that particular post office (all postal offices seem to carry their own individual hours.) Then the weekend was upon me, so I waited until Monday afternoon to go get the package.

Just days later, I went and the package was nowhere to be found.  This post office (about 4 trem stops from my dorm) didn’t have any English speakers, and my little Czech (at that time, I had only been studying for about 2 weeks) didn’t allow me to communicate what I needed. Plus the people were rude, and seemed upset that I couldn’t communicate.  I got frustrated, they got frustrated.  And eventually I was given a bundle of papers in Czech.  One of the papers had a picture of my package though! So I knew I was on the right track. Then they closed. I had waited in line for 25 minutes for almost nothing.

This time I took my bundle of papers into my university and had one of my teachers translate it for me.  She explained that my package had been moved to a different post office since I hadn’t picked it up.  She said the office hours had already closed for that particular post office (it was just after 2 p.m. on a Thursday) and that I would have to go Friday morning.

The trip to this new post office took 35-40 minutes on the train.  I got lost on the way since it was a new part of the city (I really do enjoy getting lost though, that’s when I learn the most!).  I was able to ask directions in Czech along the way though, so I managed well.

I took my bundle of papers into the main office. No Czech speakers there…so I stumbled through Czech (I was on about week 3 or 4 of intensive lessons by this time) and was given directions to the 3^rd floor.  There I received my second bundle of papers, and given directions to a different office on the same floor. 

I waited in line for another 15 minutes.  Then when I couldn’t keep up with the Czech fast enough, the lady refused to help me and sent me to an English speaking line.  Another 10 minutes of waiting.  Finally I got there, and the man was nice, and I was so thankful, I decided to get rid of my frustration and treat this worker the way I should.  He needed proof of why I was in the Czech Republic….why? Who knows?  So I gave him my student ID card, and he made several copies.  He then directed me to the first office I had gone to on the 3^rd floor.

I couldn’t believe it. Back where I had almost started the day.  There, she needed copies of my passport and 126 koruna (the fee was because they had had to move the package to different post offices since I hadn’t picked it up right away. My thought was why on earth did they move it around so many times?)  Only she spoke it in Czech…it was so fast I couldn’t keep up.  I explained to her in Czech that I was studying the language, but was still learning. 

She got frustrated with me and from there out only used hand signals to communicate.  When she rubbed her fingers together to indicate money.  I snarkily replied in Czech “Penize?” (Money?)  She nodded her head yes…instead of replying “ano.”  So snarkily again I asked “Kolik stoji?” (How much is it?) The lady with the attitude refused to respond in Czech, so she rummaged around for a paper and then pointed at the amount I owed.

126 koruna. So snarkily again…I replied “Sto dvacet sest?”  She nodded her head again. I asked if they would take a credit card, she shook her head no.  So in Czech I asked “Kde je Bankomat?”  (Where is an ATM?)  She pointed with her hands the direction I should go.  At this point I was so frustrated, I just asked if she could tell me in Czech.  She again spoke so fast (this time on purpose I'm sure) that I only caught the general directions.

Here’s what I wanted to say in my mind: “Look lady, I know you hate your job because you work for one of the most inefficiently government run postal services ever. But don’t take your bad attitude out on me. Just give me the damn package and have a piece of cake.”

Here’s what I said out loud with a sweet smile: “Dekuju moc. Jdu do bankomat pro penize. Dobry den.”  (Thank-you very much, I will walk to an ATM for the money.  Have a good day.)

There wasn't a space left open. Front, back, envelope, it was all covered with signatures and well wishers! 

30 minutes later I returned to a different lady at the same post.  I started the process all over again, explaining that I was still studying Czech, but I would try to speak well.  She smiled!!  She spoke slowly and waited for me to understand and respond. It seemed that she just appreciated that I was trying. And the conversation was fruitful.  I paid the money, was given my box and left.

My lovely mother had my hometown community send good thoughts :)

What a surprise! The package contained my glasses and a card filled to the brim with messages from my hometown, family, and old classmates.  It seriously looked as though my mother had taken this card around during the Comstock 4^th of July celebrations and begged everyone to sign it for me.  (During the week of the 4^th I had just gotten out of the hospital, was feeling pretty low, and had already gotten taken advantage of by the bureaucratic hospital nonsense). 

I finally received this lovely card of inspiration 3 weeks late, and with only 10 days left in the Czech Republic.  But it had great timing, I have just said goodbye to all my new friends, and have a couple days to spend in Prague before I begin my last round of travels with my grandmother.

I sincerely thank everyone who signed it and wrote nice things.  I opened it while sitting in a café near Wenceslaus Square (the sight of the Velvet Revolution, where Communism fell in 1989).  It brought an instant smile to my face. 

I hope all is well back home!

Best,

Cass